Here we are, halfway through the year. I had high hopes for 2017: a smaller waistline, a larger bank account and oh yeah, better baby formula.

I think formula is great, and more importantly so does my son. But if Similac Advance could just get a little more, well, advanced, it would make my year. So here are my five suggestions for the formula of the future.

The Name - Infant formula. Ugh. I mean it sounds like motor oil. Synthetic or artificial breast milk isn’t much better. I like infant nutritional drink or breast milk substitute though both are a mouthful. Even shortening infant formula to IF is preferable. I know there are many savvy minds marketing formula. Can’t we come up with something better? Words matter. And the word formula isn’t doing us any favors.

The Price - My son goes through a large canister of Similac costing approximately $33 weekly. We’re able to afford this, and the price is worth it to me, but I can understand the sticker shock many moms get when they begin formula feeding. When you consider the cost in the context of the shaming that often surrounds formula feeding, I have to ask, if formula is so bad, why does it cost so much?

The Stains - Crayola has a whole line of no mess products including washable markers and paints. All I am asking is that they get together with Similac to create some no mess formula. I’ve googled ways get rid of the telltale brown formula stains but since, like most moms, I struggle to find time to sleep and bathe, going Martha Stewart on these spots is not an option.

The Smell - Okay, I admit it; I am accustomed to the smell now and may even have a bit of an affinity for it. My adorable kiddo almost always smells like formula and I am not about to let that keep me from snuggling him. If odors kept us away from kids we would have died out as a population a long time ago. But yes, at the beginning the smell really did strike me as strong and unpleasant. I can ensure that my freshly laundered clothes smell like a mountain stream so is it too much to ask that my baby’s formula smells decent?

The Disclaimer - I haven’t checked all formula but Similac includes a short disclaimer that basically says breast milk is recommended, but if you choose to use formula we have a formula that is right for your baby. My dad pointed this out to me as I was making Similac one day. “Jeez,” he said, “it’s not a pack of cigarettes.” I anticipated judgment from lactivists but not from the very product I was using. If the canister I’ve paid $30+ for could not remind me that my baby’s food is inferior or frame formula feeding as a choice (because for many moms it isn’t) that would be awesome.

So, hang in there formula feeding moms. I don’t need a self-driving car or smart house but a formula, I mean infant nutritional drink, that doesn’t stain, smell or shame me? Now that’s futuristic.

I think formula is great, and more importantly so does my son. But if Similac Advance could just get a little more, well, advanced, it would make my year. So here are my five suggestions for the formula of the future.

The Name - Infant formula. Ugh. I mean it sounds like motor oil. Synthetic or artificial breast milk isn’t much better. I like infant nutritional drink or breast milk substitute though both are a mouthful. Even shortening infant formula to IF is preferable. I know there are many savvy minds marketing formula. Can’t we come up with something better? Words matter. And the word formula isn’t doing us any favors.

The Price - My son goes through a large canister of Similac costing approximately $33 weekly. We’re able to afford this, and the price is worth it to me, but I can understand the sticker shock many moms get when they begin formula feeding. When you consider the cost in the context of the shaming that often surrounds formula feeding, I have to ask, if formula is so bad, why does it cost so much?

The Stains - Crayola has a whole line of no mess products including washable markers and paints. All I am asking is that they get together with Similac to create some no mess formula. I’ve googled ways get rid of the telltale brown formula stains but since, like most moms, I struggle to find time to sleep and bathe, going Martha Stewart on these spots is not an option.

The Smell - Okay, I admit it; I am accustomed to the smell now and may even have a bit of an affinity for it. My adorable kiddo almost always smells like formula and I am not about to let that keep me from snuggling him. If odors kept us away from kids we would have died out as a population a long time ago. But yes, at the beginning the smell really did strike me as strong and unpleasant. I can ensure that my freshly laundered clothes smell like a mountain stream so is it too much to ask that my baby’s formula smells decent?

The Disclaimer - I haven’t checked all formula but Similac includes a short disclaimer that basically says breast milk is recommended, but if you choose to use formula we have a formula that is right for your baby. My dad pointed this out to me as I was making Similac one day. “Jeez,” he said, “it’s not a pack of cigarettes.” I anticipated judgment from lactivists but not from the very product I was using. If the canister I’ve paid $30+ for could not remind me that my baby’s food is inferior or frame formula feeding as a choice (because for many moms it isn’t) that would be awesome.

So, hang in there formula feeding moms. I don’t need a self-driving car or smart house but a formula, I mean infant nutritional drink, that doesn’t stain, smell or shame me? Now that’s futuristic.